Today I would like to deal with a topic that is probably familiar to anyone who has ever mourned a relationship that has broken down. If the love is still strong, then you understandably have the desire to win your ex-partner back .
You can find numerous instructions, tips and advice on the internet. But what really works and how are we just wasting our time? I'll try to give you a little overview here!
The hard truth
But first of all, a – perhaps hard – truth: no one can guarantee you whether you will ever get your ex-boyfriend back! We are talking here about a human being who has free will. We cannot simply impose our will on other people.
And even if we had the power to direct and control other people with our thoughts, would that be what we want? A remote-controlled puppet as a friend? Probably not.
© svetography, via Fotolia
Therefore, you should be careful with eBooks, books, courses and similar products that promise you a 100% guarantee. As a rule, the providers want your money first.
A real opportunity
So while it's not possible to guarantee success, you can still significantly improve your chances and exploit a wealth of options to significantly increase your chances of success.
In fact, there are tried and tested strategies that have helped a large number of women and men get back together. However, it can also be a longer process. The reasons for a separation are sometimes serious, so the time it takes to get your ex-partner back a big role.
The “NO CONTACT” rule
If you look at the reputable instructions and advice in this area, the “no contact” rule or “no contact” phase up. So we should definitely take a look at this rule first!
after a separation, you should avoid any contact with your ex-partner for at least a full month. That means: no calls, no visits, no meetings, no SMS, WhatsApp , Facebook messages, no stalking! You should completely cut this person out of your life for a full 30 days. Don't try to be involved in his life, avoid his Facebook page, or try to find out what he's up to.
This is probably very hard but absolutely necessary. I have dealt intensively with this topic and have found that without adhering to this rule, almost all other attempts, strategies and tactics to win back your ex become practically ineffective. Success depends on adhering to this one rule! If you really want your ex-boyfriend back, find the strength to follow this rule!
It is necessary and effective primarily for the following two reasons:
Reason 1
Immediately after a breakup you have your emotional peak - and in a negative way. You are dominated by feelings such as anger, anger, hatred, frustration, etc. You are in a mental state, so to speak, that does not produce sensible decisions and only makes things worse.
Use this time to gain some distance, sort out your feelings and work on yourself. It's important that you make rational decisions on your journey back to a relationship with your ex. Friends or family can help you during this time. You don't have to go through this alone.
Reason 2
Your ex-boyfriend will ask himself why you don't get in touch. He will wonder how you are and what you are doing. He might even start missing you. Give him the opportunities to develop these feelings!
Important NOTE
He will most likely try to contact you during this time. It is very important here that you simply ignore him. You may find out from mutual friends that he complains about you, gossips about you or insults you. But that's not because he hates you.
You should not overestimate these statements. He is in an emotionally tense state and is guided by his negative emotions. Under no circumstances should you get drawn into a mud fight! After 30 days he will change his tone again! You'll see.
What reasons led to the separation?
As soon as the initial anger and disappointment has subsided a little, you can use the time to think a little about the reasons and causes that ultimately led to the separation. These can be, among other things:
- Your ex-partner was no longer attracted to you
- Your ex was bored in the relationship
- His emotional and physical needs were no longer being met
- Your ex-boyfriend just doesn't know what he wants
- Infidelity or affair
- You broke up because you thought you'd find a better friend
- You had mistakenly accused him of cheating on you
- You felt misunderstood or neglected
- An argument escalated and led to a separation
Analyzing exactly and soberly what actually led to the breakup is very important because you should know what mistakes you made and how you can avoid them in the future. A new attempt can only work if the problems that existed are honestly dealt with.
After these considerations, you should also define a goal for yourself and for yourself. What do you expect from the future with your ex-partner, from your relationship? What should change next time? Who should work on it and how? etc.
time for changes
You may now be wondering what you should do during the no contact phase to avoid constantly thinking about your ex ? Deal with yourself! The best way to spend 30 days without your former husband by your side is to focus on becoming the best version of you that ever was.
There is almost a 100% chance that your ex will inquire about you after a breakup. Especially if you ignore him.
So instead of wallowing in heartbreak and self-pity, focus on the moment and move forward! Start seeing yourself for what you are: a strong, attractive and happy woman! Recognize the individual in you and bring it out again!
Changes that you can tackle can basically be divided into two categories: external and internal.
External changes – a new appearance
To become the most attractive and desirable woman you have ever been, you can address the following points:
- Change your hairstyle or hairstyle
- Do sports and get your body in shape
- Change your diet and eat healthier
- Get new clothes that show off you perfectly
- Beautify your smile - e.g. dental care, lipstick, ...
- Beautify your skin – care, more sun, etc.
Inner changes – mental & emotional strength
- Focus on your work/job
- Discover a new/old hobby
- Write in a journal – Writing purifies the mind
- Go out with people and have fun
- Refresh friendships and contacts
- Stay active and/or try your hand at creativity
The action plan: step by step back to your ex
After the 30 days have passed, you can then actively work on your plan to win your ex back step by step . There are a whole range of options and strategies available to you that will greatly improve your chances of success. As I said, if you have adhered to the points mentioned so far, you have created the ideal basis for giving your love a second chance.
Now it's about the following things:
- Initial contact – text messages, letters and phone calls
- Dealing with feedback from your ex
- Approach each other
- Dealing with jealousy and mistrust
- Rediscovering common values, rekindling old love
- The First meeting
- Expectations and risks
Since it would be beyond the scope of this article to go into these points in detail, I would like to provide you with another source that specializes, among other things, in the topic of “winning your ex back ” . Just click on the link to get lots of useful tips and advice.
Do you have a chance of getting your ex-boyfriend back? An anonymous rapid test reveals it.
I wish you all the best from the bottom of my heart and the happiness you deserve! All the best!
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